Within a ten-minute break between classes, one student witnessed three jaywalkers busted by Champaign's finest... which is to say that every intersection said student crossed, someone got nailed by the heat for illegally walking across the street.

 

One may look at this and argue that it isn't that inconvenient to just wait for the walk sign. Th...

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T.I. and T-Pain will not be coming to Assembly Hall Monday, October 14th as scheduled. Why? Well because T.I. has to be in court on Monday. Because of a previous drug related felony, T.I. is barred from owning firearms, and in addition to having a walk-in safe filled with guns, the rapper tried to purchase three machine guns and a silencer. Ther

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Everyone's favorite bus company, Lincolnland Express, is looking for someone to be their bearded mascot, Li'l Lincoln. You've probably seen the cartoon ads that feature a really short student with amish facial hair and a big top hat dancing around anime versions of students. It's kind of unsettlling, but maybe the real thing will be an improveme

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This is by far the strangest, most awkward letter to the editor to appear in The Daily Illini:

"Playboy's arrival on campus reminded me of the single-greatest, one-word commentary on porn I ever heard. A pal in high school had a stash of Playboys. Unable to devise a way to swipe one, I went the direct route and asked if I could "borrow" one. "S...

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Unless you live in some towering menace of an apartment building looming over Green Street, chances are you're a poor college student. Every penny counts, so here's a way to save 15 cents everytime you're jonesing for a soda on the quad.

Instead of going to the stage doors and Lincoln Hall (dirty!) or the lounge in the English Building (basemen

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The TKE house hosted the annual Blooze Bash Extravaganza last Saturday and as the video indicates, it was a mess. The cleverly named event (take out the 'l'...yay! awesome!) featured not only 14,000 beers but also some local cover bands.  

The night of live music crescendoed when the newly formed outfit Doctor Doctor Ph. D took the stage. Fille

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SHE'S OUT OF HER MIND! Here's the full scene... enjoy your nightmares!

"My Real Major is Hammered" has 117 members, all of which are undoubtedly upstanding members of society. This Facebook group shows the sad state of our institutions of higher education, not only because of the irresponsible and frivolous lifestyle it promotes, but also because it doesn't make any ****ing sense. 

'Hammered' is an adjective. That...

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Have you been itching to spend $68 on a pre-worn t-shirt with a bunch of shit screen printed on it? Well, you'll be able to soon enough; an Urban Outfitters is coming to U of I! 507 W. Green will house the so totally hip fashion experience along with some University offices. 

How do you want to tell the world you know nothing about music? How a...

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