We didn’t even score one point!

The University of Alabama decimated Auburn Saturday at the Iron Bowl. It was no laughing matter. They Pnwd us. I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life… Well there was this one time when the nurse at the health clinic remembered who I was, two years after my first visit. She was like “I remember you.” And then I reminded her that she said she never remembers her patients. It was really awkward, but embarrassing to say the least. But I digress.

We have beaten Alabama in the Iron Bowl for the past six years, but like The Comeback, all good things must come to an end. Where is God when you need him? Probably somewhere helping a celebrity win an award or smiting the gays. Because we all know that’s what he spends his time doing. I take that back, he was at the game, just in Alabama’s section, obviously. It takes a miracle from God to help them win anything. He is mad at Auburn for not naming the student union after Dean Foy, so he decided to switch sides this year. But enough about that degenerate.

I pretty much knew what was going to happen. So I didn’t even waste my time watching the whole thing. I was busy learning the dance to Single Ladies (Put A Ring on It.) We just happened to have a bad year, it happens to the best of us. We can rebound next year and come back stronger and more betterer.

P.S. Sorry it took so long for me to post. I got really sick today. And I hope I’m not smitten for calling God a degenerate.

(Photos VIA Dave Martin/AP)