Because apparently at least some of you care, it’s my high honor to announce that Brittany Flickinger has won Paris Hilton’s My New BFF!. Quite down, quiet down, I know how excited you are. For many hard weeks the contestants have been competing for the high honor of being…Paris Hilton’s new friend, and now only one has survived!

I’m not really sure what the qualifications were to get chosen, I think in the thirty seconds I watched the show I heard Paris say they needed to be “cool” and “hot.” Then they all went on rollercoasters and this little asian boy/girl curled up into the fetal position and cried.

So what about this chick that won, Brittany Flickinger? Well, on the exceptionally rare occasions when her hair isn’t in her face, she looks like she could be pretty cute, but to be fair, even the asian boy/girl was hotter than Paris.

Was there some sort of cash prize for this show? Dear God I hope so. At least with “I Love Money” you were winning money and in “A Shot of Love with Tila Tequila” you probably were flashed some boobs or made out with at some point. What does this winner of this show get? The chance to carry Paris’ dog around for two weeks until everyone forgot this show ever happened? Probably a bunch of new MySpace friends at the very least.