The CIA has finally figured out how to crack Afghan warlords with information on the Taliban that doesn’t involve guns: Viagra. Sure having a gun waved in your face can get you pretty willing to cooperate, but that’s not as fun as being able to sexually perform!

BBC News reports:

America's CIA has found a novel way to gain information from fickle Afghan warlords - supplying sex-enhancing drug Viagra, a US media report says.

The Washington Post said it was one of a number of enticements being used.
In one case, a 60-year-old warlord with four wives was given four pills and four days later detailed Taleban movements in return for more.

"Whatever it takes to make friends and influence people," the Post quoted one agent as saying.

Truer words have never been said. And sometimes having somebody by the balls doesn’t have to mean you’ve got them in a painful situation.