We’ve heard all about the trials and tribulations of being a child actor. So much money! So many free drinks! So many adoring fans! No wonder we’ve had so many Brad Renfros and Tatum O’Neals! And yet, some have scraped by without ricocheting between Narcotics Anonymous and BDSM orgy parties and made it to the laurelled halls of academia. Since snark almost gets tired sometimes, here’s our compendium of Former Child Actors That Actually Made It To College.

Mara Wilson: NYU
Claim to Fame: Being the precocious kid with a cross-dressing dad in Mrs. Doubtfire

JTT: Harvard and Columbia
Claim to Fame: Tolerating eight years of Tim Allen laughing on Home Improvement

Natalie Portman: Harvard
Claim to Fame: Being the best little assassin to ever grace the big screen in The Professional

Jodie Foster: Yale
Claim to Fame: Starring in the better version of Freaky Friday

Haley Joel Osment: NYU
Claim to Fame: Seeing dead people

Anna Paquin: Columbia
Claim to Fame: Taking the most depressing child roles ever, from The Pianist to Jane Eyre

Ron Howard: USC
Claim to Fame: Suffering through being considered less cool than Henry Winkler

Anna Chlumsky: University of Chicago
Claim to Fame: Being the only girl to ever cry over Macaulay Culkin

Joseph Gordon-Levitt: Columbia
Claim to Fame: Upstaging Danny Glover in Angels in the Outfield

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen: NYU
Claim to Fame: Not only having to share a birthday, but also the character of Michelle Tanner