Perhaps it’s overcompensation for the geriatric John McCain. Perhaps it’s an attempt to show that the Democrats don’t have a monopoly on fun with their Scarlett Johansson camaraderie and Ludacris songs and dancing on the Ellen Degeneres Show. Whatever the reasoning is, the Republicans have begun a tremendously misguided course of sexifying the party. Take Fred Thompson last night; amidst all the reiterations of McCain’s inability to raise his arms above his shoulders, he proudly declared:

In high school and the Naval Academy, John earned a reputation as a troublemaker. But as John points out, he wasn't just a troublemaker; he was the leader of the troublemakers… in flight school in Pensacola, he did drive a Corvette and date a girl who worked in a bar as a(n) exotic dancer under the name of "Marie the Flame of Florida."

Certainly, Thompson hoped to capitalize on McCain’s maverick persona, to depict him as a James Dean-Fonzie mashup, but the first thing that came to mind with the mention of Marie the Flame of Florida was that her name must have been derived from a nasty venereal legacy. Does the republican party really want to communicate, John McCain had the drips? Watching republican maneuvering over the last week has been like watching a string of landmines detonate: Sarah Palin is under investigation for abuse of power! Bristol Palin is an unwed teenage mother! Palin is accused of sex, lies, and scandal on the US Weekly cover! John McCain had VD! If the RNC requires a mascot, Britney Spears is probably free.