At any given frat party, you're bound to find the same seven types of girls. It doesn't matter if you're partying at Princeton or at Idaho State (is there even an Idaho State? If there is, why would anyone go there?). Here's the list, so you know who to avoid and who to invite up to your room for kamikaze shots:

1.) The Frat Mattress. You probably already know this girl. Hell, you've probably even seen her naked (just the one time, when the guy down the hall "accidentally" locked her out of the room post-coitus). She goes to all of your frat parties, and she's slept with at least two of your brothers. Typically, frat mattresses weren't popular in high school. When they got to college, however, they discovered booze and found out that guys actually like them...but only when they're in bed. STD you're most likely to catch: Crabs.

2.) The Overdoser. This girl makes Lindsay Lohan look like Mother Theresa, and it's not a pretty sight. She's majoring in being an absolute trainwreck, with a minor in puking and rebounding. Chances are, you'll only see her for a semester or so, or however long it takes for her parents to pull her out of college and throw her ass in rehab. Overdosers are easy to spot---just look for the girl having a seizure on the floor. STD you're most likely to catch: None. By the time you can take your boxers off, she's already passed out in a pool of her own vomit...on your roommate's comforter.

3.) The Cock Blocker. No matter how hard you try and avoid the cock blocker, she always manages to find you when you're spitting game at one of her friends. She doesn't drink beer, instead opting to just awkwardly stand around, looking miserable and asking her hot (and drunk!!!) friends if it's time to leave yet. STD you're most likely to catch: None. Cock blockers are usually lesbians.

4.) The Liability. This is a tricky little minx. She's the perfect combination of hot, smart and crazy (also known as the "liability trifecta"). In the future, she'll be a trophy wife of a politician. But not now. Now, she's the type of girl who will sleep with you one night, stalk you for a month after you don't return her calls and then tell everyone she knows that you date raped her. Unless you want a nefarious reputation for the rest of your college days, stay away. STD you're most likely to catch: Herpes. Oh, and she'll also fake a pregnancy to leech $350 of abortion money out of you.

5.) The Attention Whore. This is a chick you can't miss. When the DJ plays that Petey Pablo song, she actually takes her shirt off and twists it 'round her head like a helicopter. Easy to manipulate, you can get her to give you a oral just by saying "Hi there. My frat brother bet me $5 that you'd be too chicken to blow me right here in the middle of the dance floor." She won't even ask for your name, she'll just drop down and start Hooverin'. Years later, she'll cry about it in therapy. Right now, however, she's just eager to please. STD you're most likely to catch: None. You'd be an idiot to actually bang her.

6.) The Girl Next Door. HA! Trick question (or something, since it's actually not a question at all). GND types don't go to frat parties. You have to find them at the library or volunteering at the local food bank. Do you think wife material would ever be seen at your toga party?

7.) The Local. While you go to a prestigious university (your parents pulled every string they could grab to get you accepted), this curious lady uses words like "ain't" and has a predilection for double negatives. You'll probably be too drunk to put two and two together at the time, so let me connect the dots for you: this girl isn't in college, she's a townie. And she isn't 19, like she told you. She's 24, and has five kids at home. STD you're most likely to catch: This chick is a grab bag of filth, so there's no telling. There is a 76% chance that you'll get at least two, though.