Chris Brown ’07 was known around school for many things, including his skills as a soccer player, his incredible prowess with the young ladies, and his shimmering goldie locks. Also, this past year he was my neighbor! But now he’s moved onto greener pastures, living in San Francisco and finishing up his internship with the New Progressive Coalition, a startup political organization. We had a solid interview sesh the other day, and boy are my arms tired.

SPC:How much do you feel Wesleyan prepared you for the real world?
CB:Coming out of Wes with a government degree, I didn’t really have a specific skill set. I worried this would make it difficult to find work, but I found that most jobs out there want to train you anyway. Wesleyan definitely taught me to become a quick learner in just about any pursuit, which translates well to any work setting. I definitely spent lots of time in social settings, be it the bars, house parties, [2006-7 residence] 346 Washington. I think these things are underrated, because they teach you to be comfortable and deal with people, which is one of the biggest things employers are looking for.

SPC:Do you miss Wesleyan?
CB:Oh, for sure. Every Wednesday night, while I’m struggling with real world problems (housing/finding work), I wish I was guzzling beer and shooting pool at [Middletown bar] The Gatekeeper. I experience feelings like this quite often. Definitely miss the soccer, and friends as well. But not so much Sam Astor [’07, close friend and housemate in 346]. I pretty much came to California to be as far away from him as I could.

SPC:I moved to New York to be as close to him as I could.
CB:That’s why you and I never got along…among other things.

SPC: And as much as I would love to go into those things, anything you don’t miss?
CB: 1. The blue laws that prevent the distribution of alcohol on Sundays and anytime after 9pm. 2. Morning classes (although they have been replaced by something more evil). 3. Sundays, which kick ass now. Olin [library] is a tough place with a hangover. All I want to do is play Chinese poker or setback.

SPC: Last time we spoke, there was a hot girl in your office, but you were a little worried because she had a boyfriend. How’s that going?
CB: My office is full of attractive young women. I really lucked out…Our organization consists of five women, and me, their lackey. I’m a little upset that I leave next week to take a job at a recruiting firm.

SPC: I was hoping for some dirt. I hope the real world hasn’t made you too polite.
CB: I think I’m supposed to be PC when it comes to the workplace.

SPC: Oh. Moving on. Which did you like better, my winter party or my spring party?
CB: The winter party, hands down. When else do you get to see Hooter Glidden [‘07] aka Gunner jump in the giant tub of ice the champagne was cooling in, and begin to shower himself, singing songs of his youth…The spring party consisted of ruggers breaking into my house to shotgun beer in our kitchen, not quite as glamorous.

SPC: Also, you started setting off fireworks outside my house.
CB: Right…But fireworks were a big part of senior year, and a source of constantly burned and bleeding hands.

SPC: To end on a high note, omg remember how we lived next door to each other?
CB: Of course. When you girls [also Emily Dine ’09, and Sophia Dumaine ‘09] weren’t around bothering us, we [also Sam Astor ’07, Dave Baharestani ’07, Morgan Owen ’07, and Josh Stephens ’07] were always making jokes at your expense. It was awesome! Probably went both ways.

SPC: WHAT?!
CB: Ignorance is bliss, isn’t it.

**This interview was going to be just a simple Super Exclusive, but it seems we already have reached a high level of exclusivity for one day with Cynical Romantic’s interview with Elissa Kozlov ‘08. Mommy didn’t know Daddy was going to do that, and Mommy is very angry. Daddy will be sleeping on the couch, and maybe we will talk about joint custody in the morning.

I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to see that.