9:00 AM - Alarm goes off. Freshman Male (FM) smacks alarm clock and goes back to sleep.

9:07 AM - Alarm goes off again.

"Damn snooze button."

Alarm Clock is unplugged.

11:49 AM - FM awakens groggy and hungry. The subject searches through the Saver Magazine, but to no avail. FM must venture out into the great outdoors in search of his meal. FM walks to the nearby Fresh Express and sees some acquaintances (not friends, acquaintances... there's a difference).

"Hey guys. How was your weekend?"

"Goo-"

"Man, mine was so sweet. I got so trashed. I must have drank the whole keg by myself, literally. I might still be drunk. No, I'm not. I'm way too hungover. God, I love Ohio State. Where'd you guys drink this weekend?"

"Uhm. We studied for the midterm this morning. So we didn't drink."

"We had a midterm? Oh well, **** it. I'll just drop it. If I actually tried, I'm sure I could get an A easily."

12:02 PM - The acquaintances shrug off our FM and leave to go to class. FM, on the other hand, retreats back to the safehouse, aka his dorm, where he sees his roommate.

"Dude, where have you been all morning?"

"Some people go to class. You should try it some time."

"**** that, dude. I'll be fine. I'll study when finals come around. Hey, you want to drink?"

"It's noon on a Monday."

"It's cool. I know a guy who will hook us up."

"That dude charges you like thirty bucks for a case of beer. He's ripping you off. I'm too broke to drink with you today."

"Come on dude. I'll pay for it this time. Just drink with me, okay?"

"Fine, whatever. I'll be back from class in an hour."