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Christmas is over, and now, all that stands between us and the year 2009 is New Year’s Eve.
While those conjoined at the hip to their significant others are all set, the rest of us are left scrambling to find someone, somewhere to kiss when the ball drops.
Nobody wants to be the loveless loser in the corner who arrives at the New Year’s Eve party alone and sits idly by whilst their peers start the New Year off right with a little lip action.
If this looks like it will be you, fear not! You still have five days to find a date, and there’s no better place to start looking than Craigslist.
For the guys, if you have deep pockets, a date with this woman is a mere 1500 roses away:
You: No plans for New Years Eve. Same as last year. Wishing for something different.
Me: Hot, college educated girl available to ring in the New Year with you. D/D free.
Let's go out to dinner, drink a little and see where the night takes us....
1500 roses for my companionship. I will only have eyes for you.
Make it a night you will never forget. Xoxoxoxo
Why anyone would want or need 1500 roses is beyond my comprehension, but take comfort knowing that she didn’t stipulate if they had to be long or short-stemmed.
For the ladies, we have this fine specimen: the not-so-clever 25-year-old Army veteran.
Any ladies looking for a New Years Eve date?? I am a 25 year old college grad and retired Army Vet, I am available for the time being, looking to make this new years unfrogettable for one lady. First cum first serve!! send me your pic and info.. ASAP
Oh, he spelled “come” the way a porn copywriter would. How clever! This one is a keeper, ladies. As he said, your night is sure to be “unfrogettable.”
No matter what tickles your fancy, Craigslist has someone for you. So, start looking today...
Or, on second thought, just stay home and sleep through the pain.