Do This Stuff Before You're Dead like Gene Upshaw

Do This Stuff Before You're Dead like Gene Upshaw

When it comes to video games, sudden death can be pretty thrilling. When it comes to people, not so much. Lately, we’ve had a lot of famous people cutting out early though, from Gene Upshaw to Bernie Mac. So, to be perfectly morbid, here’s a list of things to do now— since who knows if you’ll be around in forty-five minutes.


1) Make yourself a shaken vodka martini, drink it as fast as possible, then try doing yoga. It’s far more challenging when your balance is impaired and way more fun because you’re drunk.


2) Call your know-it-all ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/sexually ambiguous friend. Tell him/her/him-her that you’re sorry for mistakes you made in the relationship and that you’d like to make it up to them by having protected sex. For once, they won’t know what to say.


3) Go to church and scream “Hallelujah!” at the end of every sentence uttered by the priest. What? You’re God’s number one fan.


4) Buy forty balloons, leave them in your dorm room, and then watch your roomie’s face upon arrival.


5) Pick yourself up a dog at the pound, name it Lindsay Lohan, and scream at it in the park.
 

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