Just when our campus was feeling pretty safe--no recent assaults, hospitalized freshmen, or Theta break-ins--the unthinkable happened: a gnome was kidnapped. The Roaming Gnome, online travel agency Travelocity's inanimate spokesperson, who is 300 years old and even boasts 14,342 MySpace friends, was kidnapped from NU's Transportation Center.

The gnomenapping was a direct result of NU alum and Travelocity employee John Graham's negligence. The gnome was left unprotected in the lobby while Graham conducted interviews in a nearby room.

If you have any information as to the whereabouts of the Roaming Gnome please contact NUPD who, as of now, "have not been contacted for ransom, nor has the gnome tried to contact [them]."