Since the writer's strike is finally over, we can bring you the next edition of The Daily Roundup. Today's top stories...

Blah blah blah oversight committee blah blah blah. What happened to masturbation?

Win funds to develop social entrepreneurship projects? EPIIC!

Freshmen writing sucks a big one, no one cares.

Julius Caesar set in the 60s? = Cheesy, tacky, gaudy, etc.

That's it? Wow there really isn't anything going on... how about some more public masturbation?

Tune in next time for more of your news, spun in circles.