Friends, colleagues, poor and dirty good-for-nothing college students, it's that time of the year again: summer. And you know what that means!  Good 'ole Mom and Dad become too stingy to dish out a few bucks, thereby forcing you to get a job for your few months of academic freedom.  They'll tell you it's a good way to learn the value of a dollar, or some bullshit like that.  Before you go bitching your way out of the unemployment line and begin searching for local jobs, check out this god-awful job. . .

Cincinnati teens, many of them under the age of 18, are fiercely competing for one of the most glorious jobs of the summer. Lead guitarist for garage band? Sleep-study patient? See-how-many-beers-one-can-drink-in-a-summer guy?  Try 'unpaid, work-12-hours-a-day (outdoors, mind you) tennis ballboy'.  

That's right, many of these (dumb) teens have sold their souls to the Western & Southern Financial Group Masters Tennis Tournament to play fetch for about the same compensation a dog gets.  Truth be told, these cats don't receive any currency for their "hard work."  One employee, 18 years of age, boasts, "He (a tennis pro) always says, 'Thank you,' when you give him his towel and he'll say, 'Please,' if he wants his water."  Oh gosh, that's just great!  Why don't you take those 'pleases' and 'thank yous' to McDonald's and buy yourself a happy meal?!  Kids. . .