Not too differently from Colbert's presidential run in South Carolina, Stoney Burke is campaigning for the world's most powerful job. His flyers and propaganda can be found outside Dwinelle, or wherever Stoney decides to set up soapbox and heckle those who don't listen to him. And he's better at it than Karl Rove.

Platform is unnecessary, Stoney is our homeboy. Don't forget to write his name in on the ballot.