Any Slow News Day Can Be Solved with Crime Notes

Any Slow News Day Can Be Solved with Crime Notes
While Google Image searching for "flaming port-a-potty" I stumbled upon the underground world of portable toilet drag racing.

Two words caught my eye yesterday while reading the Daily: "flaming toilet." I love Crime Notes, whether they're showcasing the criminal dangers of malfunctioning grills or reminding us all that spitting is in fact a crime. This case however was something far more sinister as an arsonist destroyed a toilet in a restricted area of the golf course. What's next? Firebombing the awful stench out of the MLB bathrooms? Filling up the urine troughs with gasoline at Michigan Stadium?

My psych class has allowed me the pleasure of knowing everything about the workings of the human mind. Now I'm going to use psychodynamic analysis to say that this arsonist was repeatedly given swirlies while in junior high and is now exacting his revenge upon innocent toilets everywhere as a grown man.

But at what cost? According to that report, the toilet is valued at $1,000. What?! For a plastic box with a hole in it? Although if it's on U of M's campus it was probably like the Alfred B. Taubman Portable Toilet of Social Justice or something like that.
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Anonymous
omg omg omg the Alfred B. Taubman Portable Toilet of Social Justice lol Posted 10/28/2007 12:32 PMReply

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