Wow, we're really picking on The Collegian this week, but it's like every day we look at it, throw up a little in out mouth, and then have to write something about it. We didn't pick up an actual copy of today's Collegian (have you looked outside? We're not going out in that mess), but we did see Penn State president Graham Spanier's guest column in today online edition of The Collegian. Apparently this is the first in what will become a regular gig for the prez ... oh joy!

The column is an attempt to set the record straight on a number of "myths" associated with Penn State, but in our opinion it just seems like a lazy way to churn out a column. Within his list of "myths" about the university are a couple of "who gives a shit" explanations, like:

• On Faculty - "The average Penn State faculty member works about 52 hours per week."
• On Construction - "...  even with the new buildings Penn State has among the lowest overall space per student of any school in the Big Ten"
• On Athletics - "Football and men's basketball do make money, but all of the profits are used to support Penn State's entire intercollegiate athletic program, which consists of 29 teams."

But where the spin control really comes into play is the other myths.

In debunking the "myth" that Penn State is becoming a school for the elite, Spanier says, "About 74 percent of Penn State undergraduate students receive some form of financial assistance ... . About 60 percent of our students have loans."

Well, thanks for that explanation Graham but that just means that only 26 percent of the student body can actually afford to go to school here. Now, we know what you're thinking, maybe Penn State can put some of that endowment that we read about yesterday towards the tuition for those students, kind of like what Harvard, Penn and a number of other schools are doing.  According to The Collegian, we have the 46th wealthiest endowment in the country with $1.59 billion. Well, Graham's about to put you in your place:

"We are first in the size of our alumni association and the number of alumni donors .... And while we have lots of donors, our endowment is small for a school of our size. In fact, the growth in market value of Harvard's endowment for the last fiscal year alone was 3.5 times greater than Penn State's total endowment market value as of June 30, 2007."

Sounds like Graham is saying it's the alumni's fault that you're paying that high tuition. If those cheapskates would just open up their checkbooks a little then maybe Penn State could do what Harvard is doing. Wonder why those alumni are so cheap? Maybe because they're paying their student loans for 20 years.

So, besides the alumni, is there anyone else to blame for that high tuition Graham? Ah, the state of Pennsylvania you say?

"Given that as a "state-related" school less than 10 percent of our budget comes from state appropriations, our tuition increases have been absolutely necessary to maintain the quality of a Penn State education."

So, if only the alumni and the legislature would give up some more money then those darn tuition rates wouldn't be so high. Thanks for the lesson in Penn State economics President Spanier!

Hey Collegian, when's his next column? We totally can't wait!