We’ve gotten a good bit of exposure to sexual addiction this year, from Peter “The Porn Hoarder” Cook and David “Not Acting on Californication” Duchovny. The American Psychological Association, as well as most of America, does not accept sexual addiction as a real or diagnosable disorder though, instead regarding it as an excuse for a lifestyle adopted by no good, prostitute-buying, porn-entranced, lying, cheating, responsibility-shirking, greedy philanderers of the worst sort. What really boggles the mind though is the question of how purported sex addicts are treated at sexual rehabilitation centers. We know heroin addicts are administered methadone, but what do sex addicts get? Aversion therapy in which they're whipped when they get boners? No, they'd like that too much.

According to sex therapist Jill Bley:

The treatment is somewhat different from alcoholism or other addiction treatments, yet very much the same. The first step is to acknowledge the problem. Then, if they work the 12 steps to recovery, they will go to 90 [group treatment] meetings in 90 days. It's important that they get a sponsor, too. That's the person you call for the purpose of helping you not act out sexually, and also help[ing] you work through the stresses and anxiety that lead to acting out sexually. Sometimes treatment means checking into a rehab center so [patients] can get out of their normal environment and habits…

When they start the process I will ask them for six weeks of total abstinence. Not even masturbation. It's really hard for the addicts, but you can't do anything till they get sober and abstinent. We have their partner agree. During that six weeks, the anxieties that led to the sexual acting out usually become very apparent to the therapist and the partner. Those anxieties are what you want to work on. Then after the six weeks you have them work on having all their sexual behavior directed toward their partner.

That’s all well and good, but it sounds less like treatment than letting someone go on a dry spell. Perhaps the more prudent thing would be to avoid the following men: Charlie Sheen, Michael Douglas, David Duchovny, Peter Cook, Peter Doherty, Eric Benet, Colin Farrell, Billy Bob Thornton, and Tom Sizemore.