Hey ****s who keep talking about "March Madness" and “brackets” and shit: get over yourself. “Oh did you see Xavier last night?” “You think we can go all the way and reclaim our former glory?” It’s people like you that make the world terrible and perpetuate communism. That’s right! You’re a communist, because not everyone gets to be in this special tournament. Some of us have terrible basketball teams, if any. So while you are out placing bets and drinking and having a great time, think about the guy who is awkwardly sitting in the corner routing for a team from a school which they don’t go to (I usually pick the ones with: A. cool names, B. cool mascots (like that funky bird thing), C. whatever is on your sweatshirt).

Note: Sorry about the graphic, no photoshop this week