The Smoking Gun reports that Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" lecture at UCSD back in May cost more than Paris Hilton insured her ass for: a whopping $100,000, that is.

The lecture supposedly addressed his message of "planetary emergency." The real planetary emergency is that a man with a receding hairline can get paid $1,300 per minute to wave his arms around for an hour or two, while the rest of us have to do real stuff. You know, like investment banking. Or looking pretty. Whatever. The point is, for that kind of money, I'd honestly rather watch Paris Hilton's ass. The rest of her body doesn't even need to come.

We also shelled out the big bucks for security guards, first-class air travel, environmentally conscious transportation, and $1,000 a day for incidental expenses. I don't know what kind of incidental expenses the man has, but the prostitutes around here really don't ask for all that much. Maybe the ones without STDs cost more, but I wouldn't know.

Oh well. I suppose it's always reassuring to know that our presidential candidates have money to throw around. But on the off chance that I see Al Gore on environmentally free public transportation, I'm demanding $10 of his incidental expense fund for my next meal. Should he choose to deny that planetary emergency, this blog from hereinafter will be devoted to spreading nasty rumors about him.

PS: Like this one. I heard Al Gore litters! Pass it on.

PPS: Join my new Facebook group - Paris Hilton's Ass for Sun God 2008! Pass it on.