If you've been in the UCSB bookstore lately, possibly to buy your UCSB sweatshirt, you may have overheard one or more of these gems:

"Wait, the books are downstairs?

"We have a downstairs?"

(on cell phone) "I saw you changed our facebook status to 'in an open relationship'. What the ****? Were you planning on telling me this in person, or *something unintelligible*."

"Where do you keep the textbooks?"

"Where are the books for classes?"

"What do you mean they're downstairs? Do we have a downstairs?"

So, besides one piece of juicy facebook gossip, the general consensus seems to be confusion about the bookstore's lower level. Don't worry, freshmen. You'll get the hang of it. It's all downstairs from here.