Brooke Hogan, 19, (real name: Brooke Ellen Bollea) recently stuck her pug nose to the grindstone in an attempt to gain admission to at least one of Florida's finer institutions of higher learning. But the University of South Florida, Florida State University and the University of Central Florida weren't having any of it: Hogan only got in touch with the schools to plan an intro meeting, but was immediately rebuffed.

The dealbreaker? Brooke is still filming her family's fiery trainwreck of a reality show, Hogan Knows Best (guess that's why his son caused a nasty drunk car wreck that left his BFF a vegetable and his wife divorced him? yeah, defs) -- and that means a nine-camera crew following Brookie from her dorm room (oh, you know she'd get a single) to lecture halls to keg stands. The official tack: the schools didn't want their other students to be "distracted" by the filming -- because as you know, college is where you go to focus, not look at narcissistic girls in skimpy outfits. (Duh!)

But no rest for the wealthy! Hogan booked it over to Florida Atlantic U, which actually allowed her to set foot on campus and even talk to some of the students. As soon as that hit the newswire, though, FAU backpedalled: no, no, Brooke has not applied, and no, they wouldn't necessarily let her in even if she did.

This has all got me feeling pretty bad for little Brooke, though you have to wonder whose idea it was to Go To College -- her's or VH1's. Maybe she's just feeling the tick of the biological clock: girl turns 20 on Monday. So at this rate she's going to drop out after only a semester or so "to pursue [her] singing/acting/modeling/fashion design/lady wrestling/hot tranny mess career."

But what I'm really wondering: why nine freaking cameras? This isn't The Thin Blue Line here, people -- and no one needs to see every angle of those denim chaps.