Because we don’t hear enough about Harry Potter these days, Maryland professor Dr. Christopher Welsh thinks the book will teach kids a lesson about underage drinking.

For the record, I completely agree with Dr. Welsh. Harry Potter is chock full of great lessons about drinking. If I’m being hunted by the most powerful wizard in the world, hell yeah I’m gonna need a few shots. And if the only blood relatives I have treat me like a dog? Well, Jesus get the kegger going. Harry Potter, if nothing else, has taught me that there are certain times drinking is perfectly acceptable.

I can only hope that in the seventh book Harry deals with Dumbeldore’s death by becoming a raging alcoholic.