Apparently there have been some emails floating around regarding an armed robbery that took place early this morning at 2:54 am, so for those without friends who care about you, consider this your email. Apparently a pedestrian was approached by two white males, one of whom punched the victim in the face and threatened him with the claim that they had knives. They robbed him and sped off in a dark green or black Toyota with "728" included on the license plate. One of the males was described at 6'3 with short brown hair, the other was undescribed.

If you know anything about these shmucks please report it to campus authorities. Walk in groups late at night and stay safe, and if any of you need a personal escort my services are always available. 

More information regarding the crime can be found here.