The line at Starbucks and Espresso Royale are out the door. It takes half an hour to find an open seat at the library. Your friends are bitching at you for no particular reason. Yep, it’s finals time. In order to increase productivity without being an anal jackass, here’s a list of tips to make your study and test-taking time a little less neurotic.

Tip #1: Work in groups. Being cooped up in a desk with a cup of coffee and a stack of lecture notes as your only companions is a shitty way to go. Study with some friends from your class, if you don’t have any friends, make some. If you approach the quiet Indian kid in the back you’ll find that he’s actually quite engaging. Discussion is a more effective learning method than memorization.

Tip #2: Test the way you study. Odds are you’ve already met the kid who gets wasted/high every night yet manages a 4.0. Research has shown that if you study under the influence, you should take your tests under the influence. I’m not advocating any shit-faced finals, but if you are one of those types either throw back a few shots or take a few puffs before you walk into that room. It’s science.

Tip #3: Relieve yourself from “stress”. This is perhaps the most critical factor in test taking. You can either do this yourself or you may phone a friend (Ladies, blue-balling here may ruin someone’s career; suck it up!). Personal studies have shown the latter to produce better results. Do not, under any circumstances, take any exam with a loaded gun. People get hurt that way.

Tip #4: No bathroom breaks, take care of business. The meal before an exam is not the time to try the new dish at No Thai! or throw down three Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers from Wendy’s. Michigan tests better than Michigan State because we don’t have a taco bell on campus, don’t let anyone tell you different. Also make sure you wake up early enough to allot yourself the necessary time.

Oh yea, I forgot to mention. Paying attention in class and doing the work might also help. Best of Luck.