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Michigan Greek Mythology: Alpha Phi
By Paul Tassi (Chief Contributor) Tags: greek life

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What do you mean I've idealized them?
Alright look, I know I've contributed the the Alpha Phi problem. I wasn't aware my opinion mattered so much when I ranked them #1 on The List, but I should have realized the consequences when I rated them as having the hottest pledge class as well. No wonder I've gotten so many Facebook friend requests.
The truth is, they do deserve it. At least in part. They do have the hottest, most diverse (hair color-wise of course) collection of girls on campus. Like I don't really see how that can be argued against by any objective observer. And I have found that generally they are nicer than most other sororities, although that can be equated to finding the nicest grizzly bear in the woods.
There's been a lot of drama about so-called "dirty" techniques employed during rush. I wasn't there, I don't know, but I wouldn't put it past them to hide uglier girls in the kitchen or show special treatment towards their favorites. As one commenter remarked, "If you're not cheating, you're not trying" and I'm well aware rush can be a cutthroat game. However, some of the charges, like frats giving out pencils, is just plain dumb. Like really, if you make your judgment about how to spend the next four years of your life based on a pink pencil handed to you by a brother in Phi Psi, you shouldn't be allowed to go to school here.
So yeah, Alpha Phi is by no means perfect, but I don't regret giving them my two #1 spots which I hear they use as a point of pride. Although I'm honored, they should be careful, pride will turn them into Tri Delt real quick, and though they're on top now, the winds around here can change fast.
Campus rep: 10/10
Bitch factor: 6/10
The truth is, they do deserve it. At least in part. They do have the hottest, most diverse (hair color-wise of course) collection of girls on campus. Like I don't really see how that can be argued against by any objective observer. And I have found that generally they are nicer than most other sororities, although that can be equated to finding the nicest grizzly bear in the woods.
There's been a lot of drama about so-called "dirty" techniques employed during rush. I wasn't there, I don't know, but I wouldn't put it past them to hide uglier girls in the kitchen or show special treatment towards their favorites. As one commenter remarked, "If you're not cheating, you're not trying" and I'm well aware rush can be a cutthroat game. However, some of the charges, like frats giving out pencils, is just plain dumb. Like really, if you make your judgment about how to spend the next four years of your life based on a pink pencil handed to you by a brother in Phi Psi, you shouldn't be allowed to go to school here.
So yeah, Alpha Phi is by no means perfect, but I don't regret giving them my two #1 spots which I hear they use as a point of pride. Although I'm honored, they should be careful, pride will turn them into Tri Delt real quick, and though they're on top now, the winds around here can change fast.
Campus rep: 10/10
Bitch factor: 6/10
Comments 
Anonymous says,

"I must tell them to be careful, pride will turn them into Tri Delt real quick, and though they're on top now, the winds around here can change fast."
hahahahahahahah
hahahahahahahah
Posted 10/25/2007 3:37 PM
Anonymous says,

Wait...please tell me Phi Psi didn't actually give out pink pencils.
Posted 10/25/2007 4:12 PM
Anonymous says,

As the person who wrote "if ur not cheating, ur not trying" as a joke, I'm glad u chose to put it in ur article. How many other ppl can say they've been quoted by Johnny Quest
Posted 10/26/2007 11:04 AM
Anonymous says,

thanks to this post a lot of unattractive alpha phi girls think they're way hotter than they really are..
Posted 01/21/2008 5:02 PM
Anonymous says,

Beyond the unattractiveness...what's up with the bitchy attitudes to match?
Posted 02/13/2008 2:41 PM








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