Yesterday, I posted my little definition of a sexcapade just so we are all on the same page. Now, I want to share with you some of the best sexcapade stories I have ever heard. This first story is from my buddy who goes to UCSB and it is probably the worst thing that could possibly happen to you while trying to make a move.

So one night after partying in Isla Vista with my buddies, I was ready to go back to my dorm and get my "d" wet with this girl I have been hooking up with. So we make it back  and start climbing up into my loft. I noticed how drunk I was when I almost slipped off the ladder, but I was way too determined (horny) to let that stop me, so I kept going.

Everything was fine at first. Just the standard making out and foreplay before we got to the good stuff. However, as soon as I was finally able to get it up enough to actually perform, it was over. I started to feel the mixture Popov and Natural Light from earlier coming up. I leaned over the rail in a desperate attempt to try and make the trash, but my efforts were futile. Instead of just yakking over the edge, I lost my balance and my whole body went over, crashing down on my desk chair and shattering it.

The next morning, I woke up naked on the floor with my puke to my left and my broken chair to my right and the girl was gone. It's alright though because I got up, showered, and still nailed that same girl that night because I am good like that.

Somewhere Tucker Max is smiling.