Drinking has just become classier than ever with the advent of Charles Shaw's wine- AKA $2 Buck Chuck.

This aforementioned beverage should and will (if you are smart) become your beverage of choice for every awkward freshman first month get togethers.  Not only will you be able to say good bye to Kharkov, Smirnoff, Jack-off, or whatever you kids are calling it this days, but you will also emit an aura of aristocracy.

You know why?  Because this wine is the most magnificent wine that has been placed on earth and it only cost two dollars- hence the name.  Unfortunately for you immobile people, it is only available at Trader Joe's in uptown.

Not only will you be classier than Ben down the hall on the weekends, but also thriftier.  

Mmmm...Merlot....