Buried deep within the catacombs of the Internet, locked in their subinternettian lair, a group of scientists brood and scheme, swearing revenge against the diabolical arXiv, an e-Print archive of scientific studies overseen by the Cornell University Library.

From a ZPEnergy.com message board post, describing the Machiavellian principles of the arXiv:

[The arXiv overlords] have perpetrated serious discriminations in the listing of preprints, not only against me and several distinguished scholars I know, but have also perpetrated also [sic] Mussolini-type suppressions of the listing of papers from various minoritarian foreign groups that are now causing a much overdue uproar since, whether scientific or ordinary, crime (i.e., violation of our laws) never pays and must [be] cured to prevent sinister complicity.

In their crusade for "scientific democracy" against the evils of the arXiv, the scientists, led by the heroic Prof. Ruggero Maria Santilli of the "INSTITUTE FOR BASIC RESEARCH," have banded together to support a lawsuit aimed in part at CU's arXiv for "complicity in paternity fraud."

Evidently, the entire case is a plagiarism complaint, where Cornell's only affiliation seems to be that the plagiarised papers in question were published on the arXiv. Sorry, the evil arXiv.

So far, the scientists have amassed a crack squadron of vigilantes, ranging from Prof. Santilli to . . . one other scientist. But once enough "colleagues" have read their message board post, the group plans to gain at least one more supporter, making the Thermal-Dynamic Duo into a full-fledged Cornell-hating cadre.