Our two-part series examing the North vs. South debate continues as we analyze the South Campus dorms and the cognitively disabled who dwell within. 

The Easy Bake Oven-sized rooms and the absence of air conditioning in the dorms means South Campus folk get to spend the day roasting in their own beer-basted, sweaty marinade. The kids down south will say they don't care about the heat or cramped living conditions, however, because South Campus is WHERE THE MOTHER****IN' PARTY IS, BITCH! This statement, unfortunately for them, is actually very false, as partying occurs pretty much everywhere around campus.

The one advantage South Campus has over North is the attractiveness of its inhabitants. This is negated, however, by the extent to which said attractive people are stuck up their own asses.

Since America hates ties and demands a winner be crowned, the nod must be given to North, even though they're both winners... because they're not West Campus.