"Get off your badonk and stop procrastinating. Right now. No, not after the Gilmore Girls rerun ends. Now now." 

How does he know?

The nugget of wisdom for the punctually challenged: once a procrastinator, always a procrastinator.  Or so says Slate's Seth Stevenson in his Letter to a Young Procrastinator: "Stop resisting and embrace your procrastination."

"You're going to procrastinate anyway, so you may as well enjoy the time you're stealing from your tasks," procrastinator extraordinaire Seth advises.  Delusional Seth rationalizes: "While that grind in your econ class is toiling, you're becoming a more relaxed, quirkier, less-programmed person. You nurture the creative sprouts that take root only in long hours of idleness. You're open to soulful experiences that lie only beyond the bounded worlds of work and study." 

p.s. Don't believe a word this guy says.