Warren G. Whitelightning has quite possibly supplied the most amusing news story I've read all year.  His name alone is awesome.

Mr. Whitelightning stole a Krispy Kreme truck full of donuts from an Open Pantry parking lot and proceeded to lead cops on a high speed chase through Madison.  Hilarity ensued!  Seriously, this story and this story sound like they're from The Onion.  Classic stuff.

"Because what you have is two different police agencies chasing the defendant in a stolen Krispy Kreme donut truck with donuts flying out of the back of the truck," goes one quote from the story.

Some choice reader comments:
--Say it ain't so Whitelightning! Say it ain't so!!! AhhhhhHH!!! 
--red hot pickled sausages Krisky Kreme = Crazy Delicious
--That guy almost got away with a lot of dough. 
--Misdemeanors imposed upon Mr. Whitelightning include: 
       *Discharging a donut within city limits 
       *Placing posessing or using bait to elude police 
       *Exceeding daily bag limit of giant red-hot pickled sausages