We have all played the game “Would You Rather”. You most likely have stumbled upon the book in Urban Outfitters near the check out line and laughed out loud at some of the “would you rathers” they were throwing your way. And even though they rarely get old, they are always funnier when you get it but the person next to you doesn’t. So what better way to feel more inside on the joke than create some “would you rather” situations that only Wisconsin kids would get.

1. Would you rather drink out of Scanner Dan’s coffee cup or blow into the harmonica of the “orange jumpsuit guy” who sits in front of the bookstore?

2. Would you rather drink a cup of the spicy mustard from the football stadium or a cup of Nitty sauce?

3. Would you rather sleep with a Coastie from New York or a freshman?

4. Would you rather sleep with the guy selling newspapers outside of Walgreen’s or actually read one, cover to cover?

5. Would you rather get hazed by the band or have a scandalous picture of yourself with a tuba appear in your mini feed?

6. Would you rather hook up with your class president or whoever is wearing the Bucky Badger costume?

7. Would you rather recreate a “slip ‘n’ slide” on the frozen lake or on Bascom hill?

8. Would you rather hook up with one of our football players or have guaranteed football tickets next season?

9. Would you rather have the flu on Halloween or on Mifflin?

10. Would you rather have a mean text appear on the Brats big screen about you Tuesday night, or have a mean ‘shout out’ dedicated in your honor Wednesday morning?

If you can decide which is worse between Scanner Dan’s cup and the old guy’s harmonica, please let me know. Other than that, these questions truly never get old and can be applied to any situation. But only the truest UW students who have an active social life and have actually opened their eyes in library mall will be pondering the tough dilemmas such as these.

To everyone else who doesn’t go to UW: jealous?