Why do bad things happen to good people? The Emmy Awards begged that question with several silver screen stars looking like they had raided the Ricky’s clearance section the day before Halloween.

Take Christina Derosa, who attended the Emmy Awards dressed as a cross between a flamenco dancer, a go-go girl, and Queen Elizabeth I. Another actress who mixed disparate looks into a strange amalgation of no-no's was Phoebe Price, who attended the event looking like Richie Tenenbaum, if he became a satanic call girl.

Then there was Taraji P. Henson, who may have been wearing the corset from a Frederick’s of Hollywood Catwoman role-playing outfit layered over a trashbag. Perhaps she was in a rush like Glenn Close, who appeared to have showed up to the red carpet straight from hosting a black-tie funeral for Ray Charles, dressed in a manner which could only be called Fatally Unattractive.

Last but not least, were Eva Longoria and Hannah Cornett, who tripped and fell into a vat of froofiness, Longoria with an over-sized bow dominating her petite frame and Cornett wearing a dress which seemed to be edged with a ruffly Christmas tree skirt.

These women are rich and beautiful. Why are they paying stylists thousands of dollars to put them in hideous clothes? Tim Gunn, where were you? We know not at Parsons...