No need to attend a sex toy party, just hop on the interweb to get one of these toys for the dorm room and beyond. All of the toys are under 30 bucks, and you can't beat the pleasure you will get out of it!

Girlie Get-Off Gadgets

1. Cool Power Bullets ($12.95)

Similar to the infamous "Pocket Rocket," these bright metallic "bullets" are step above semi-automatic; they're just fully loaded. This is perfect for a college coed on the go, with no time for the overzealous stimulation of nausea-inducing college guys.

When To Use: Just before exams, to clear your mind with an orgasmic release.

2. The Clitoral Climaxer Mini Stimulator ($19.99)

This purple joy-giver will be a great addition to your academic schedule. Not only is it small, so your nosey roommate won't find it, but it's sure to become your favorite thing to relieve stress. You can use it with or without a partner for a boost to hum drum dorm sex.

When To Use: Take out the "climaxer" when your roommate's gone for the weekend. Light some candles and put on the I-Love-Me music, then get down to loving yourself.

3. The Jack Rabbit ($19.99)

This is a tried & true staple in the world of female toys, many women already have one - so jump on the "Rabbit!" It comes in great colors, it has seven speeds, it vibrates, it rotates; basically, it puts the penis to shame. The coolest part is the tiny "bunny ears" that stimulate the clitoris.

When To Use: Any time will do, but please clean up after yourself!

4. Blossom ($19.99)

A flower for your flower. Mostly for clitoral stimulation, this flower-shaped device slides onto your finger and then sends you into floral ecstasy. It comes with a small controller to switch speeds, and the unassuming shape makes it look a decoration, instead of a va jay jay toy. Sweet!

When To Use: If you've spent all your money on beer and hard liquor, so you've been forced to take the abject poverty diet. With this toy, you won't care that hydrochloric acid is gently reminding you that you haven't eaten a decent meal in two days.

Male Alternatives to the Five Finger Choke Hold

5. Sophia's Luscious Lips ($18.99)

In the line of "blow job imitators," this stimulator gives the feel of oral pleasure complete with a tongue piercing. There's an opening for easy clean up and a space for an additional vibrator (which is sold separately). The piercing is removable and it has ribbing for extra pleasure!

 When To Use: The frat party ended up being a sausage fest and you need to blow a load.

6. Lacie Heart Pocket Pal ($27.99)

 I'm sure OTR's Lacy will be happy to know that there is a penis toy out there with her namesake, but aside from that fact -- this is an all together cool toy. Vivid pornstar, Lacy, decided that her poon should be manufactured for your pleasure. This toy is made of the most sensitive material to give the real feel of getting action.

When To Use: The cock tease from your literature class keeps dodging the inevitable and you need to let off some frustration, pronto.

7. Flex-A-Pleasure Anal ($23.99)

Easy to use, fun, smooth and popular; its got a five star rating! This anal stimulator is great for venturing to your back door with ease. You can use it alone or with a partner, either way the results should be thrilling.

When To Use: Your hot sugar is out of town and daddy needs some attention.

8. Silicon Slim's Nubby Bullet ($12.99)

Finally, a great bullet-like item for men! Use this in a quiet serene place. This item also has a five star review and the user comments are off the charts. This is a must-purchase item for the guys.

When To Use: Off-campus in a secluded area because the reviews on this item seem to be stellar and we don't need campus security at your room.

Love 'em, use 'em, and have some happy orgasms!